Office Etiquette (what not to do)

How to toss your co-workers up underneath of a bus:

"John Doe has been out of the office for a few days, but I understand that John will be in this afternoon."

Lesson one: Never tell anyone when someone else will be back in the office, especially when that someone is returning from vacation! Oh, and the fact that this person (John in my example), is not coming into the office this afternoon, but is actually getting off the plane from their vacation this afternoon.

Do you really expect people to drive from the airport directly to work and check their email?